Jeliza

I WROTE THIS ON MY FACEBOOK LAST AUGUST 24,2010 at 2:13 a.m.

This event happened 4 years ago. Days before my college graduation, my family went through an experience which I thought would make us a broken family.

My father whose works would usually involve transferring from one place to another was so weak that he wasn't able to fight temptations. My mother was devastated and couldn't think so well because she lost her self-esteem and worth as a woman. When I saw this happening to my parents, I couldn't help thinking if my marriage lifein the future will be same with what's happening to them. Right in front of my eyes I can see that trust to each other was lost even to the point that respect is no longer being observed. Can you imagine how frightened I was seeing two important people in my life losing their trust and respect to each other?

The only thing that marks in my mind about that event was when I had a talk with my father. I really made sure that he can see how I rebel and makes him realize that I don't deserve what he has done to our family. I was really hit when he asked the question, " Barb, nadumduman mo sa isa ka semana kung kapila ka mka txt sa akon para kamustahon ko?"Kabalo ka nak kabudlay bala kung ang obra ara sa layo. Budlay pero kinanglan ko magsakripisyo para mahatag tanan sa inyo sang manghod mo. Di bah nangin responsable man ko na tatay sa inyo? (Barb, can you remember how many times in a week do you usually sent me sms asking me how am I in my work. You know what "nak" it's so difficult to work in a far place. Difficult ,but I have to make sacrifices so that I can provide for you and your sister.You see I tried to be a responsible father.)

Indeed my father is a responsible one. He may have hurt us because he wasn't able to fight temptations ,but he is a father and a husband who longs for affection from his family.

I opened my heart and I really tried to listen to him. Even my mother realized a lot of things and was able to give reasons to what was happening to our family during that time.

My father is an imperfect man. He may have flaws ,but one thing I am sure is no matter what happens he is and will always be my father. I am and will always be his daughter. I didn't close my heart and let hate overpower me. If I am going to recall, my father have made a lot of things to me which I give little appreciation.

Now, I realize that I still have a lot of time to make it up to him and to my mother. Thank you lord for giving me an imperfct father who makes everything so perfect.

I love you tatay and nanay!I miss you!